WARNING! WARNING! I HIGHLY RECOMMEND NOT TO READ THIS POST DURING ANY MEAL!!!
mailto:MEAL!@#$ing, !@#$, !@#$ing-!@#$,!@#$ing,-Oh,-Oh,-am-I-being-received-across-the-globe-and-out-in-space?-I-wish-to-become-the-first-message-to-be-received-by-unintelligent-life-forms-in-any-galaxies----please-come-to-earth-and-take-our-leaders-back-to-your-planet-we-have-no-need-for-them-anymore-they-have-taken-all-our-money-and-bankrupted-earth-will-let-you-have-them-for-nuttin-please-please-please-oh-will-give-you-all-the-Ding-Dongs-a-fine-chocolate-snack-your-spaceship-can-hold-your-truly-Professor-of-Dumassology-Dr.-Glen-View.
See what can happen when you leave your child unattended OR you leave an old man that knows nut-tin about computers alone after taking his daily dose of !@#$ING-seratonin-re-up-take-inhibitor-somethin-or-the-other. SCARIER THAN YOUR WAITER, WHO'S WEARING ONE OF THEM NOSE RINGS, WHO'S ABOUT TO SERVE YOU DINNER! YOUR WAITER HAS A COLD AND YOU CAN IMAGINE A GOOEY BUNCH OF ???T DRIPPING OFF THE BEAUTIFUL, BUT APPETITE SUPPRESSING GOLD PLATED NOSE RING!
U-know what? O'l dumass Glen may have just discovered a new weight loss plan. Instead of all the other diets in the world, including hynosis. Visualize the waiter with the yuck, I can't repeat that again! Whenever hunger hits, recall that picture I vividly described to y'all, yuck, yuck, yuck!!!
##################################################################
I know you're probably thinkin to youself "DAMN! That be one !@#$ed up old !@#$er! I concurr! (Does concur have one r, or two r's, I prefer two and that be a better thing to think about, bout now!)
How does one get to be as, as, as, as, as screwed up as me? Well! I been working a lifetime to attain the highest degree of un-sophistication that I have ass-er-tained! I'm at the 32 degree now, only one more degree and I'll be a complete and total Master! U-can tell I'm real close can't ya? Damn! It will be the happiest day of my insane life!
This accomplishment would not of been achieved, if not for some special people, I have had the luck to be around. I have so many I would like to thank, including the many teachers that had to go away, after only a few weeks of me in their classrooms. I wish all of you well, especially since I never had the privilege to see you again. The only info the Principle gave me as he pushed me out his office and locked the door is "they be in a better place." Some what confusing fer a child in Kindergarden!
When I was young they had separate classes for the Special Ones. I believe they call them Challenged today. Everywhere I go people ask me "are you challenged?" I answer "yep!" You would be surprised how nice people talk to you once they know your Special!
I found me a nice place to work where they treat the Special Ones right good! I feel at home here and I'm not the only Special One! I have many Special Friends and when I'm out shopping I see more and more!
I have been reading a lot about what may have led to the Challenge Pandemic of the last few generations, from medicines and vaccines, seems each new generation receives more and more vaccines to vaccinate against the vaccinations OR so it seems to one Special one like myself.
I've read about pesticides that have been around for the farmers to rid themselves of all the pesty pest. Although I'm not sure what kind of pesty pests a farmer out plowing in his $100,000.00 Tractor in the field would ever encounter? Perhaps a wayward opossum or a bandito raccoon, they wear a mask for a reason u-know, or an old half blind Buck Deer thinking, "that Tractor is a mighty fine looking female!"
You wish to see pest drive into my town in the heart of the Midwest after midnight stop at a Convenience Store especially in the summer time. These Convenince Stores make it uncanny convenient! These pests stand outside smoking something that wow-za, makes my mouth dry just walking by them, and are they dressed funny, can't keep their breeches up and have braces, but the Dentist apparently was drunk, cause they have metal coming out their eyebrows, metal studs on their lower lip, on their tongue, rings through their nose and other such strange places, only one with a mind like mine can imagine!!! That Dentist must have a good business, cause I see many around my town that look like that!
Articles about contamination in our drinking water, seems along the mighty rivers medicines and everything that goes down the toilet is filtered through water filtration plants, yeah right! What's left is released back into the river. Why don't they just call it what it is, sewage, uweee!!! So the next town gets the shit end of the river (place laugh here) so on and so forth and then it goes out into the ocean making Challenged Seafood!
I read about Chem Trails. Now what the hell is a Chem Trail! Chemicals supposedly sprayed from the air to rid the planet of pests! I suppose like the Farmer spraying his land to get rid of pest, only they be covering more ground quicker than the Tractor!
There must be an awful lot of pest in the modern world! No matter where I roam, I find pest. I meet some of the Pestiest and Challenged ones I have ever had the misfortune to encounter!
LIKE I SAID "I CAN'T THINK OF ANYTHING INTELLIGENT TO SAY!" gLeN
YUCK about the waiter with the nose ring !
ReplyDeleteI think the chemtrails ARE to get rid of the pests, but the scary part is they think WE are the pests .....
As for intelligence, I know you are kidding around, but I think you have way more intelligence than you give yourself credit for. You just balance it out with your silliness
*smiles*
Have a great day Professor