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Friday, March 23, 2012

Nutter Butter Cocktail For The Mentally Impaired???

Silliness prevails, no not my silliness! I thought I was plum silly, but when I read the newspaper or articles on the net, I see plum loco people a plenty! A young girl texting, falls into a lake in Michigan! Hey, I can't make this stuff up, this funny!

Tebow mania goes to New York. Now this should get really interesting! I can't wait to see what happens!

Anyhow, the press can rest and write about someone else, hopefully, other than Peyton Manning.

I'm priming my brain trying to click onto something, but I'm not sure I can make it happen tonight. Too long a day. I'm afraid my brain has gone to bed! Baby, I'm trying to revive a dried up well! Surely, I can find something to complain about! I'm totally aghast with fear! What if? I have the dreaded silliness block? What if? I can't write anymore? I think I'll try meditation, maybe a 10 minute nap of meditation will help, damn sure ainna gonna hurt nothing at this point. So here goes. Deep breath ----- deeper breath -------- cough, cough, cough. DAMN! To much air!  [snoring --- !]

Thirty minutes later I'm awake and have peanut butter on my mind! I've come back from the dead, food is on my mind! Yippee yi aw! I must have peanut butter! I must be running low on nutty butter protein, in my gooey tank! Man oh, man! That was good! Gosh darn it! I haven't taken my silly pills. I was so tired, I forgot! I should come to life any minute now. Pills and peanut butter, that's called a nutty butter cocktail for the mental impaired! That's it! Finally! I'm cooking! Whew-wee! That was a close call! I began thinking, what if! I couldn't practice my silliness every night before bedtime, I may as well die! Be like the girl falling into the lake while texting! I was so scared! OH NO! MY FINGERS ARE IN LOVE WITH MY KEYBOARD! THE SAME AS THE ONES ADDICTED TO TEXTING! It's worse than I thought, please help me! We're even more alike, I can't type worth diddly squat, and, and, them texters misspell words on purpose, where I can't type! I'M SO CONFUSED! Perhaps a double peanut butter cocktail, straight up, no bread, just me the spoon and peanut butter! Wow! I'm living dangerous now! I be teetering on the precipice of nutter butter no return! To do, or not to do! That be the question! Can I live with myself, if I'm not nutty? The answer is NOPE! I must be what I am! Perhaps the reason I'm still here is to share my nuttiness! You see some people need marijuana, cocaine, poor man's crack, and all that other stuff, this old boy knows nothing about! Just give me my peanut butter, straight up and my blood pressure medicine.

Oh! Oh! Oh! Finally my brain cells are kicking in! What in tarnation is this here "pink slime?" Yeah, they be puttin some stuff which is called filler into ground beef. I don't know about you but I like beef --- in my ground beef! The U. S. D. A. SAYS NOT TO WORRY, IT'S ALL BEEF PRODUCT!!! Those words scare the hell out of me and I'm going to start grinding my own or start eating bison burgers! What the hell does U. S. D. A. stand for any way? I believe, US are Dumb Asses! Yep! They take this whatever it is and use ammonia to make this pink slime red! If it were real beef what !@#$ING color was it, to begin with??? Damn the whole thing sounds so stupid! It was approved to go in school lunches by the "US Dumb Asses!" Oh yeah! That pink slime makes that spaghetti sauce delicous, more delectable, than real beef! Man them hamburgers are so good and so much healthier for our children! Give's a complete new meaning to sloppy joe sandwiches, don't it!?!?  Am I making you hungry? I hope there was peanuts and not some kind of brown slime in my peanut butter!

I like meatloaf and I put many kinds of filler in my meatloaf! But from now on, I DAMN SURE! AM GOING TO BE SURE! I DON'T START OFF WITH some kind of ammonia shot pink slime something or the other! I wish to choose my own filler, like, onions, crackers, eggs, etc. From now on it's going to be Glen's freshly ground real meat or bisonloaf!        Damn, I'm tired and that's all I got for tonight, please come back now ya here! Glen

1 comment:

  1. UGH, you had to mention the pink slime mess. I heard about that awhile ago and now it seems someone has brought it up almost every day lately. It makes me want to become a vegetarian, or at least give up beef. I go to the store and wonder just what is real food and what is not these days. Maybe I will just live off of water.........wait, the water is all contaminated along with the air and everything else we need to live. There is no hope for us Professor!!

    I won't tell you what I read about the stuff that gets into peanut butter haha. And I eat a lot of that so it is quite the dilemma for me .

    Enjoy your weekend and don't let the "silly block" overcome you. Your silliness is my smile for the day most days :-)