OLD DOG

You know what I think? Oops sorry! You can't, because I haven't written anything yet! Sometimes, I get confused! No! Not from old age, I have always been confused!!! Even as a wee pup, there be so many things I did not understand. Then I thought, when I go to school I'll understand. Yep! I'll learn everything I need to know! I learned to read, I never learned to write, right! Guess what? I sure as hell ainna gonna learn too if-un, I ain't by now! I wish to quote myself for y'all out there on that big beautiful planet and to you Aliens tuning in! (Ah, ha, ha, ha!) I kinda like that! Firstly to you Aliens, "There sure as hell ain't no !@#$ING intelligent life down here!"

I plum forgot what the quote was to be.... Oh now! I remember, If I haven't learned to write right by now, I never will and guess what? "I don't give a rat's ass!" That's not the complete truth! "I don't give 1,000 rat's asses!" That there my friends and neighbors of this crazy home planet of ours be the truth! This old man, actually I prefer Old Dog better. This Old Dog just wants to have some fun with words, telling stories and his thoughts doing it in his own way! Trying to understand proper English and all them tenses, well "THEY FRICKING MAKE ME TENSE!!!"

My oh my! After I lurned to read right good. I become the little Glen readun machine, yep there wurnt nothing I wood-unt read! Anything and everythang, I cood get my eyes on, I wood read! When I was bout 12, I seen a Playboy magazine. I red that, but never luuked at them pitchers though!!! Yes sir-ree when this Old Dog was a Young Pup, I was into all that lurning.

Before you know it, I'm in my twenties, life is good! Young and full of yourself with life to look forward too! Naive, like a young pup taking it all in, hurriedly smelling, seeing, taking it all in, can't get enough, I need, I want! Before you know it your thirty, still young but some maturity sets in. Thirties was both good and bad! Life becomes more adult like. Fourties are extremely challenging, changes to your body and mind, you don't like, life goes on!!! Fifties mentally and physically hit you like a ton of rocks. Realizing you have not LEARNED anything! You have lived life, learned through actually looking, seeing, questioning. NOW, much of what you've learned through schooling, reading is incorrect! What man has messed with, man has tainted! You cry out, but nobody hears! At the age of sixty, you start to learn again! You see life for which it is! Not through the shades of dark sunglasses! Rather, through the best clear lenses, with bifocals! Most of life is a farce, as you believed, what you've been feed, like the fatted calf! How could I have been so stupid? You listened to people that you trusted, unbeknowst, they eat from the same feed you have been feed, generation after generation!

Ah, but somethings different know, how so? An Old Dog has more time to lie around on the front porch, watching the young pups fly by at dizzying speed, smelling, a-howling, thinking with their youthful exhuberance, the thrill of life so new, it seems life is simply chasing rabbits and butterflies! But the old Rascal know thinks, with a heart! Head and heart work as a team! Damn you howl out for all to hear! But you're just one OLD DOG!!!