My attitude at work has been deeply curtailed for about a week. I have slowed myself down mentally and physically. I told myself last Wednesday after returning to work, "to slow... down..." I don't need this shit anymore! Meaning, so what if I work half as hard as I used to! I'm too fricking old to work like I once did!
I've always worked to please myself. Meaning, I like to work! Get them endorphins singing, "HI-HO-HI-HO-ITS OFF TO WORK I GO! Well this old body ainna a spring chicken...no moe! This old body be a winter chicken! Winters are for hibernating, a long winters nap! I gonna slow way down, yes I am! Give me a hallelujah on that!!! Done got my evaluation for this year, instead of time to celebrate... Issa gonna hibernate! Let them young spring chickens, do the work for old Grandpa Glen here!!! Let them pick up the slack for a while! WOW-ZA...HALLELUJAH... PRAISE THE LORD ON THAT!!! I've been retooled!!! This last illness has caused me to "see the light!" I stared, directly into that light! Yes-sir, Yes I did! At first, I could not see clearly, from the throbbing headache. I looked down that tunnel as I was going to the light! I paused, looking back up, into the darkness from which I come from! BIG HALLELUJAH!!! I brought... that vacuum of suffering... onto myself... yes I did, and I alone! I must cave, give in, or give out! There's no one to feel my pain, my suffering! Quite frankly they "don't give a rat's ass!!!" ((( THEY BE TOO BUSY TEXTING "JOB OPENING" TO THEIR FRIENDS, IF I CROAK!))) If, and I say IF, I was to slide away into oblivion tomorrow! Whom,,, I say whom,,, would care??? Oh there would be a couple mind ya, that like this old fat fart of a man!!! Them youngsters be gnawing at my job before my body is stiff! Yep, it be the truth and that be mighty sad! It is... ain't it? Hallelujah! I'm testifying to y'all today! I'm turning er loose! I have nothing to lose! BUT!!! I have tomorrow to live for! Them Pied Piper Purple Pickle Eaters, ainna... I say ainna, seen the last of Grandpa Glen Bob View! No way! No how!
The last six days at work, a kind of drunken stupor has taken over me! My mind feels drunk, my body feels a step behind. It be............................like............................... I'm stuck in half-speed............. Somehow, I've been slowed down! My body is working at the speed of what it wishes to! It be in the half-speed gear.
I've always expected more out of myself, than any one else! I cast that devil out! Be gone little demon, go poke at some one else with that little pointee pitchfork!
If these here Bosses of today be satisfied with the quality of help... "they hire," then why the hell do I care! Ain't gonna be a blown heart vein on my heart! Huh-huh!
I'm truly enjoying this drunken stupor of a mood I've been in! I want! I SAY! I WANT! It to continue! If I can stay in this drunken stupor and stay my, I SAY, MY SILLY ASS SELF. Have mercy! Just, I say just think of the stuff, I say STUFF! I might write! ALRIGHT! GLEN