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Monday, December 30, 2013

Whatcha-a ma-call-its, do-dads, and stuff!!!!

How's everybody doing all across the world on this winter's morn? Anybody that returneth to my humble home away from home, I wish the top of the morning to ya!!! I'm so glad your here! I've been watchin' some late night television, on my free t v antenna, and 1993 R.C.A. tube type t v. Call me old fashion, cause I am.

I'm addicted . . . there, you've heard it first on Glenview! Ever since I made fun of those late night commercials I've been watching television for the commercials and channel surfing when the program comes on. I realize there's more creativity in those commercials than the programs. If these masterminds behind the commercials would create the programming, it would revolutionize (Damn that be a right fine word, don't you think") the industry. It's dying for sure!!! We need new blood, badly!!!

How so? I do not watch much regular television. Late night t v reruns of old shows still tickles my funny bone. I Dream of Jeanie, (And a I still do! Mr. Ed of course, of course, good old black and white movies, an, on and on . . .)

I for one wish them vampires that seem to be everywhere on t v should suck the blood out of the programmers, creators, or whomever, think's they are creating creativity in television.

More creativity gets created in The Super Bowl commercials than gets created all during the year.

Sure some of them are real stinkoids, the sad factoid is that some during The Super Bowl definitely created, by college graduates that are morons!!!

How the fuckoid, do them pretty boys know what we the real people like.

You see, that's my point . . .they don't!

A local new car dealership during the holidays is showing a commercial that if you buy a new car during the holidays, they'll give you a 43 inch big screen t v.

Here's the funny part, I cannot remember what kind of car their selling, but I can remember what kind of televisions their giving away! (Samsung)

Cute commercials attract my eyes. The little dog on the old Taco Bell commercials was a real riot at my house. (I'm still addicted to the place, 15 years after the little fellas last one!)

The Geico commercial with the little lizard, what is that a gecko. Woow! brother, blows me away!!!

The Christmas Budweiser commercials, I go buy cases of the stuff and hand them out to alcoholics, so that they will be happy during the holidays!!!

The mice driving the Kia Soul, a work of advertising art.

I remember Andy Griffith used to do a commercial he said, "nothing goes better on a ritz!" I have not, ever . . . been out of a ritz cracker since that day!

How about the helpful hardware commercials that used to be? "Ace is the place with the helpful hardware man!" Ah takes me back!!!

There's no such thing as a hardware store around my neighborhood, no more!!! There's tattoo and piercing shops though!!!

Poor old Mr. Rogers is gone, but never will be forgotten! What would he say now????

Ever try to find a whatch-a-ma-call-it, in todays mega stores. You go to where you think it might just be, but there's so much stuff, it boggles your mind. You can't find it. You want this one little do-dad, (That's what my momma calls something she did not know what it was!)

You find the little place where a computer sits, that's where the friendly hardware people suppose to be texting on their phones! After half an hour you realize that nobody works in that department! You find Earl, the 80 year old salesman in his scooter, that's in charge of the whole fricking, 200,000 square foot store!

He has had a stoke, but's still knowledgeable. Ya see, he use to own one of them helpful hardware stores, until this, everything under one roof, if you can find it store, came to town.

Yes Earl knows more about hardware, than all the people in all of the new hardware mega stores combined. There's talk of getting him a faster scooter!!! Damn . . . does Earl, know his hardware!!!

You have to get real close, and speak plainly, to make sure old Earl sees the do-dad clearly. Then Earl's eyes will light up, sure-nuff, he's a tell ya, where it is. There's days where customers be waitin' for the doors to open for Earl.

Earl will tell you, if you can understand him! "They want you to buy the whole kit and ka-bootle, rather that just the do-dad, ya see!"

Meaning, instead of you buying a piece for a few dollars, they want to sell you a new one, for hundred of dollars!

I THINK I HAVE FELL IN LOVE WITH THIS FELLA EARL! I MUST REVISIT HIM AGAIN, WHAT YOU SAY?

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