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Wednesday, August 31, 2011

Meditation & Confucius

Watch out now ya hear! I'm going into my meditative state. Later on I may try my medicative state. Why? Well hells fire why not! I want to see where I'm the silliest! [deep breaths] ohmm... ohmmm... ohmmmm... Damn, I may have me a hit song there! Sorry, I broke my concentration. [deep breaths] ohmm... ohmmm... ohmmmm... [ __________________] Five minutes later, I thought a vision or something smart is supposed to hit me? Man I got nothing! What the heck, maybe I need to reboot! No its too early to go to bed. I'll try again [deep breaths] [snoring] [snoring continues] [still snoring] Fifteen minutes later, the hell with this meditating stuff, I always go to sleep. Wait a dang gone minute.... One minute later, that is the point right, to relax your mind? Apparently I don't understand meditation! I have read where people get really relaxed and have visions, everything is so beautiful you ride above your body and fly at total peace with the world around you. You contact your higher self, talk to your spirit guide. I have heard of wonderful things happening with fantastic journeys.

Okay, okay, okay. That's too much, that's what I do when I dream! So what's the difference? I can't sit on a hard floor and cross my legs I'm too fat! The hard floor kills my bad back! Oh! oh! oh! I'll bet ya the ones meditating are burning some mighty powerful mind altering incense or some other mind altering good stuff. Oh, so you have to know your drugs to get into the meditative state.

I'm getting a vision just thinking about people everywhere hanging out at their neighborhood Meditating Joint, Bar & Thrill. (ha, ha, ha) Burning the meditating drug of their choice. If your high on some really good mind altering stuff and your having visions, then you become like a really smart person. I'm still having trouble understanding this meditating crap!

I have seen documentaries and read stories about Monks living on the mountain tops in Monasteries. (Is that why there called monks, short for monkeys because they live way up high, just wondering.) Does the higher altitude enhance meditation. So that's what I'm doing wrong I need to be so high up that I receive less oxygen to my brain. Now that makes sense! I pass out and while I'm out I receive visions. Damn, I'm not going to climb no damn mountain just to learn meditation.

Any of you out there that read my blog may say, "damn that's one crazy old man". Right on! That's not meditaing that's ME! (scary thought ain't it) I can't help wondering though, what would happen if I could get me some of that oxygen deprivation high altitude mountain mind altering crispy air? Man that opens up a whole new world to my already ??????? whatever you wish to call it mind. I might LIKE IT and decide to stay. Do they have electricity up there? I hope so, I could get high on some mind altering drugs and get some of that high altitude air. Whoo-wee, have mercy, no telling what kind of visions I might have!

Anyhow, I took my medicines and am reviewing what I wrote and I have no idea what the hell I just wrote. Humm, making me think, maybe that's what a vision is! You receive silly thoughts from out of nowhere! Sounds perfectly logical, ONLY, I receive silly thoughts all the time. I reckon I understand now! I work with some mighty strange, I'm talking S-T-R-A-N-G-E ones. Like the ones I call Mighty Mouth, Van Dan the fork lift man, Ah Klem, Knot Head, Lu lu, several with a first name then Bob. They are more challenged than most. Most unusual group I have the misfortune to work with, maybe, just maybe that's why I'm a mite strange, ya reckon!!!!!! I stay confused because everyone I work with is confused, including the leaders, there the most confused of all! Confused seems awfully close to a fellow I've heard of named Confucius. Is he a real fella? I have heard Confucius said this and Confucius said that. Sounds like one smart fella to me! He sounds like a philosopher, much smarter than the ones I come into contact with.


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