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Sunday, October 10, 2010

I LOVE THIS

Where did that last post come from. I must of fell asleep and Tired Man wrote for me. Enough of that crap. I'll keep a can of "Jolt" within arm reach. Forgetting your vitamins affect you more as you age. I thought it could of been Senior Man, he's a sly cunning old fart. Too dark for Philosophy Man. Appears more of a Tired One. I'll call him Common Man.
My mind fluctuates to extremes, always has. I will be morose one moment then laughing the next. Some might call this "Crazy", I think it makes for interesting conversations to the ones residing within. No I do not have schizophrenia. I have a cast of misfits that have taken up residence and choose to peek out occasionally. Mostly harmless souls that dance in my mind and say things at the most unexpected times. I use to walk around and be talking to them, other folks would look at me with uncertainty. Do they not have inner voices. What teaches them right and wrong. I was told by my grandma that we have an Angel on one shoulder and a Devil on the other. Please, don't tell me that's not true. Grandmas never lie. No I'm not wacko. (My wife might disagree with that) I simply choose to entertain myself. One Flew Over The Cuckoo's Nest was a fine book. I felt right at home with "Jack and the boys".
Have you knew someone lacking in imagination. Creepy! little activity there. They do not read for pleasure, (say that's not so). Impossible, are you kidding me! When you learn your a, b, c's, it's the beginning of life itself. Curled up in beside the fireplace on a cold day with Corkie the Yorkie on your lap, sipping hot chocolate. (You mean to say there are people who do not do that). No high blood pressure on these wonderful journeys, unless Nurse Ratchet , Cratchet, Crikey I forget pops up.
There is, this here slang for television called the "BOOB TUBE". Seems stupid to me. (That is what it means). Commercials blast out to wake you from a deep sleep. This is when they want your brain to be active. When selling products. Who gives a rats a?? about survivor 20. If you remain in the no-zone world  of unintelligent beings, you would miss the commercials. Info-commercials, what the hell is that? What tiny headed num-nutted nit-witted advertising moron come up with that. Sheesh! makes my skin crawl. Here I was finally getting used to a fast talking man repeating the same words over and over 60 times in 60 seconds and still not knowing the product he was pitching. Now a commercial is 30 minutes. Stupid ?sses!!! The ginseng knives make me want to drink gin and slit my wrist. Is that the point ?
They take a homely looking woman that has never smiled, who has not brushed her greying hair and seems to be in pain. Now! look what our magic makeup can do for you. Pleeaassee! It was not the makeup that redone the lady in pain. A new hairdo with coloring, longer lashes, she presents a beautiful smile, 1.5 tons of bondo and a handful of "OXYCOTIN". (They take us for oxy-morons). Sheesh! a warted witch would look happier on "OXYCOTIN".
Beer commercials are for the ones who mentally never made it past 12 years of age. One day they are sitting at the kitchen table drinking genetically modified milk from Bessie who weighs 10,000 pounds. Producing half a tanker daily for farmer Fred. (Yeah, I used to have 100 head of dairy cows, now it's just Bessie and me). One day, the forever young 12 year olds are hanging on the couch. One who is wearing a black sheer stocking on his head, just lifted a case of Bud from 7-11. Ahman is stoned on the favorite smoke of his ancestors, talking crazily about 69 virgins. Boo Boo, now your new best friend that you only met yesterday is reminiscing about the good ol days when you and he skipped school. Yoo momma has allowed you to live in the apartment above the garage. With one stipulation, never sit foot in her house. Especially at night. Officer Frank Magnum is way too trigger happy especially when he and momma are diddling. The hospital bills are too expensive.
I heard momma say something about a "$1,000,000 insurance policy. I was floating in and out from the meds".
This is what I love letting my mind go anywhere it pleases. It's an awake dream. I do not wish for reins, that defeats the thrill. My brain has always been, (think) "verb"+ UP! Is it good or bad? "it's me". I do not wish to be anything other than who I am. I will show my innermost thoughts good or bad as I attempt to do it humorously; however sometimes life is not funny and I might sneak in the dark side occasionally. That is how I wish to present myself to you. You will learn more about me than 10 ????ing psychiatrist. I had a childhood friend that would use 10 ?????rs to describe everything. From 3rd grade on he used that phrase. There was 15 children in his household, I do believe he earned the right to do so.
To never attempt is to always fail. It's possible the trying provides the adrenalin. I have fun with myself at the words I come up with. It's my inexperience at typing. I might start a screwed up word book. How about Glen Views Terms and Slang. Ah Oh ! (maybe a might too close to Sling Blade). How about "Dancers In My Head". "Maybe, Let's Play Peek A Boo In My Brain."                        

2 comments:

  1. I haven't finished reading this post, but when I read this line just now "No I do not have schizophrenia" I had to laugh and laugh, because I just wrote that about myself yesterday and I had not read this post of yours at the time. Are you sure you are not my long lost brother??? Hmmmmm

    I swear some of things you say at times sound so much like me..........wait..... I feel the makings of another story or book or something. I better shut up, you might steal my idea hahaha!! Ok, back to reading.........

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  2. Ok, now it is getting scary........ Now I read this line "she presents a beautiful smile, 1.5 tons of bondo and a handful of "OXYCOTIN". (They take us for oxy-morons)". Well now, I thought that oxycotin-oxymoron joke I made on a comment to you awhile back was from MY mind.......original..... but NO, here I am reading this from you, something you wrote in 2010 and today is the first time I read it. Alright, something is up, am I one of those people in your head??? hahaha. Maybe I am not real after all. Oh my, I feel like I am going crazyyyyyyyyyy *laughing*

    Well, yeah, I think you are my twin brother and we were separated at birth, maybe we were conjoined twins at that hahaha!!! oh wait, I don't think a boy and girl can be conjoined... anyway, how interesting and weirdly strange this all is.

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