We babies, sleep, laugh, cry, poop, and pee. Sorry I forgot throw up. Feed me pat my back, then I belch release gas and nappy time. I dream of the good ol days. Just the right temperature made you feel snuggly. Darkness was security. My only time of concern was when something penetrated my mommie and I would be tossed around. Then Oh...Oh...Oh...Ah... Ah... Ahh. Then I would become real relax.
My first glimpse of life was my mommie expelling me. I wake up early for this! My head is stuck, I wanna go home. I'm being evicted. Hey take it easy too much pressure on my head, squish plop! I'm cold, I wanna go home. I don't like it here, there's something hurting my eyes ( what's eyes ). I don't like it. I get snipped, poked, prodded, washed ( I kinda like that ). Then I hear my voice for the first time. I do the waaa-waaa song as soon as I get enough air. I'll fracture some glasses with that. They put a warm fuzzy hat on my head. Ooh feels so good, oh no! I have no hair. Waah waah I can't go through life without hair. Waah waah I can't go through life wearing a stocking cap, I'm too young to join a hood. If I could get some shades perhaps I could salvage some respect. Aaah! I'm wrapped in a soft warm blankee almost as snug as what my momma used to be. There is one of them big headed creatures starting to get on my freshly realized nerves. He gets right up into my face, don't you just hate that, smells like coffee and un-brushed teeth and here I am as snug as a bug in a rug a brand new baby with a bath eeuuh. After them big heads play ball with me, sticking things in places I hadn't realized yet I even had places and a terribly cold thing was placed on my fresh new baby skin front and back. Whew! I bet I'm sweating, that's more work than I have done in 9 months.
We, "we ones" know more than them big headed lulu's think we do. We get babymail through the navelnet at 6 months. We start downloading vital baby data from our mommie.
It has been quite a day, I need nourishment, seems one of my downloads mentioned sucking for nourishment. One of them ugly big heads lays me next to my momma. My mouth is puckering but my vision is shot. Hello there! my mouth found that suckee thing. After nourishment I'm slapped on my back. Heh! take it easy I'm a tiny tot. Buurrp! I lay down with my mommie and visit nappytown, where I reminisce of the good ol days.
Shot out of the cannon was the worst day of my life. As days go by I get use to the big headed ones, even the one who has sand paper for a chin. Don't he know how delicate baby skin is. I suppose it's just another day.