I am a drinker. Finally I can admit to myself, my family, to the world. After all these years. I can honestly can say whole heartedly, I absolutely love the taste of a cold one. It does not matter what day,if it be the heat of summer or the cold of winter. What minute or second of the day I will chug a cold one. A can, a bottle or from the spicket um-um-um, the taller the better, the ones chilled to the point of ice crystals floating amongst the liquid pleasure. Whow-wee, it don't get any better than that!!! Only wooses drink plain ass water. I wish for the drink of champions everywhere, it makes your toes tingle as you drink the first taste everyday. It gets on your whiskers and they cry out more! I know I liikkee it, hell yeah! It gives you a jolt that makes you want to scream out! Who wants mountain glacier run off that penguins have shit in since the beginning of time. I gotta have manmade additives to cheer me up. The drink is mostly water anyway, I want to feel the relaxing pleasure of my mountain fresh water with brisky tangy goodies that men have made generation after generation.
Don't go talking any of that light crap for me. I have worked on getting my stomach this size for fourty years. I want only the full flavor stuff hitting me belly. Hit me with your best shot!!! Oh yeah baby, one is never enough unless it is a bucket size, fresh from that ol spicket. I thoroughly enjoy the sensuous build up of them there wet clouds on top. It makes me oh, oh, yeah!!!
"You damn fool, shut the #&*# up says Suzy Smart Assy, you dummed, damned men, think about only two things. Sex for your sexual appetite and a tall cold one to wet your whistle. Do you think blowing every "thang" out-ta porportion especially your itty-bitty male part and under-developed brain that all of you have".
I'm terribly sorry, I must apoligize for Suzy she somes times jumps right into my thought pattern and gives her un-asked opinion.
She made me loose my frame of reference, ex-cuuse me as I take a drink to remember where I was "BIG BELCH", sorry, it is sooo good! All these years of heavy drinking ain't harmed me none. I save them damn aluminum cans until I get a pick up full and start wringing my hands and a thirst begins developing in me belly. Whew doggy, No ham bone for Rover, no new dress for my woman. I'm visualizing cases and cases of the goood stuff! JUST IN CASE (HA, HA) I HAD YOU GOING MY DRINK OF CHAMPIONS IS COCA-COLA............................................................................................... UNTIL NEXT TIME.