IS THIS ALL THERE IS?

Here I am again, as I try to get a new schedule for my  . . whatever it is I do! Hope you don't mind. I have had wayyy, too much fun in the past, as I attempt to stretch my mind. Like a rubber band stretched too the max, I'm  gonna snap. Naah, got to have something to work with, to be pushed to the max. I just wanna have fun, yep that be me.

My thinking is . . .? If, I set aside a certain time of the evening, say from 7 PM to 8 PM and let my mind wander fer a spell, maybe, just, maybe I'll kick start my engine once more. I certainly hope so, I miss letting my thoughts take me anywhere and everywhere. I think that has been my self help manual in recent years.

It has become my absolutelyiest, favoritiest, funnest, thing to do, in a long, long time.

Take the barriers down, shout up into the heavens. I gotta be me, I gotta be me!

A few years back I ask myself, "is this all there is?" You know . . . one ages.  Well the body does, not the mind! "That in a nutshell may be the problem hey?"

I needed something I just didn't know what. I reckon I needed a challenge. No longer able to do the physical hobbies I once could. Age had boondoggled me. (I have no idee [Meant to use idee!] where that boondoggled word come from!)   (((Well that's not entirely true you know. It's out-ta my head but for that word to come to the store front [Once more meant to!] at that particular second intrigues me and makes this endeavor of mine so fricking fun, I sometimes can hardly stand it!!!)))

My definition of boondoggle would be, stuck in a rut and unable to go forward.

My dictionary says. Boondoggle, a trifling, or pointless project. Well I'll be durn, it does make sense don't it?

It is the challenge that drives me, an ordinary person. Am I right? What would life be without a challenge. No, no, no, I'm not talking bout the daily menial challenges that make me cuss, that hinder us every day! I say to them, shake your head, count to, one hundred and ten, then laugh. "BABY, it donna, matta what others think!"

I think back fondly about me wanting to write. Simply put, I believe most logically, it was my way of expelling my demons. Pent up demons with nowhere to roam, stuck inside my lifetime accumulation. You know what I mean don't you? Sure you do. The focus of learning, creating, challenge, has enabled me to see, to learn, to grow beyond my corral of childhood.

I read a poem today and was aghast by its simplistic beauty. This poem amplified so wonderfully by the adjoining picture with water movement.  I cannot write poems, but damn I love beauty. That's what living is about? Yes! it is!!!

As you know, I write what I feel, and that has become my salvation in recent years. The challenge of me learning to type at my age, when I could just sit on the porch drinking lemonade and whiskey ain't for me, nope, nada.

"We win by challenging the challenge" (and I know you know what I'm saying!) "The winning is living another day, years, with purpose in our lives. What is life without purpose?" Please ask yourself that question."

I KOW, AND HOPE TO EXPLORE THAT IN AS MANY WAYS AND IN MANY TYPES OF MEANING, UNTIL THE DAY I DIE, HERE ON GLENVIEW.  Until we meet again, this will be a forever continuing project of mine and mind.