Root Beer, and Castrated Hogs. (yes really!)

Hello my friends, you don't mind if I call you that, do you? I shall answer for you.

"Hell no! If we come back here to Glenview, to check out where your mind is, then we need help too!"

"I concur!"

It's Saturday in the A M and AM I tired! I was baaad! After work I was so HUNGRY! Others were baaad at work, but I was goood! They "worked me like a borrowed mule."

I'm also  woozy, as in light headed, and a feeling rights goood!

If this damn spell check don't quit fixing my words I'mma, gonna, smack the letters off the screen!

I went to a place we call White Castle, got me a few of them little square cheeseburgers, with onion cooked on them. And a Barg's fountain root beer. Damn that root beer done went and done somethun to me brain, annnd me whole fricking body!!!

I have not had me any alcohol of no kind, in more years than I can count! Damnnn, don't have fun at all!

"""I believvve, I'lll get me one of them Barg's, root beer, eveeery night!"""  Better still, I'lll  get me a super large, as in 64 ounce insulated mugs and filll er up everrry night before I go to work.

Take me a huge hit, afore I walk in the dooor. I'lll be a singin',   "tonights the night, everything gonna be alright!"

Susie will ask "what's the matter with you, you're singing and smiling?"

Me "oh, I be on some new medication! I ainna taking no more of those Doctor prescribed pills, I be on pooor man's-sodie-pop, and I be a popping baby!!!"

"Buttt . . . Gleeen, you can't work like that!" Susie emphasizes!

"The hell I caaan't, watch me now!"

I MIGHT BE A BIT OUT OF HAND TONIGHT, SO I'LL TRY A THOUGHT FOR TODAY.

As far as the ability to hear and converse, I'd be better off wearing hearing protection, instead of my hearing aids!

The dollar amount of an item, is determined by the dollar amount willing to be paid, by some one.

Welll, let me just say this about that! I do watch some late, as in really late, as in 3 A M, and there MUST be, a lot of really stupid people, willing to pay ANY price on the silly ass things I see!

Helll, they'lll give it to you frrreee + shipping and handling.  Okay! okay! okay! I figure if their going to give you something frrreee, ya see, then they must be charging you an arm, and a leg for the handling and shipping part!

Heeere's what I figure, they'll have some local, big ass freaking morons, deliver your product, demanding the handling and shipping fee. So all you gotta do is let grandma answer the door, and have her do one of them Kung-pow moves, she be a learning on, The Destroyer Channel. Kung-pow them in the dumb-nuts, and they'll forfeit the handlin' and their shippin' fee! They'll be a squealing like castrated hogs!!