Blessing, or a Curse?

I never get tired of ideas floating in, from no where! I do get tired of not being at my keyboard when the misty mysteries of the universe come a callin'! It's exhilarating, even though most all of them escape me in the twinkling of an eye. Some like last night, as I was relaxing after a night of work was a complete story line, the one that I began about The Knights, took unforeseen complexities.

It boggles me that when I'm at a point of complete total relaxation before sleep takes over that such ideas come to me. It also boggles my mind, at my dreams! If only I could capture them and hold onto them, for later playback in "Magnificent Dreamscape." It's just not what I experience, it's the overwhelming emotions that's overwhelming! 

I am the dream, the dream is me! In the dream there are, no limits! They're more real, than real! It's as though there is another added sense, that knows how to cleanse my emotional impurities, that will if not balanced, shall consume me! They're there, so that I can live, another day. Although I don't seem to realize, that's the way I see them at this moment in time. The one constant I've been able to maintain always, is my dreams, my escape route from realities!

My realities is what I feel, and all my senses combined, is my essence, as only I can perceive them! They may appear meaningless to others, but they don't live inside . . . me! What I see may be like water off a duck's back to others. I imagine if only I could be like that, then all would be well, but would it really? You know like the grass is always greener on the other side scenario!

I tire from examining, placing too much emphasis on little things. I was in management for a good many years and I tell myself those perceptive skills helped me immensely then, by catching those almost invisible pieces of the puzzle. I like to think that's when I picked them up, but can honestly say they've always been there. Is it a blessing or a curse? Most intriguing question! On my good days I welcome the insight they bring me, on my bad days I feel that I'm cursed for some unexplainable reason!

To question is normal, is it not? Am I to succumb to the confines of others I'm confined with? Our environmental relationship makes us, I see that as so in childhood of course. We are the sum of our parts and the parts we spend the most time with makes us right?

At what point are the confines released so that we find our self? I believe some never do, actually probably the majority won't allow it to happen, unknowingly of course! Life takes over and we take the same old path that's always been! 

To search the path of enlightenment is to always search, ah, but the search is the enlightenment and to never know is the challenge!