Do you believe in fate? What is fate? Fate to me is predetermined. I really never dwelled upon it before. I am now fascinated by the simplicity of the word! If our destiny is set for us then why try altering anything? If we cannot and we come to realize that it seems like our life would be so much simpler.
If we combine fate with faith, now we're on to something. We have faith that our fate cannot be altered and follow the daily path no matter where it takes us.
Wow! Is that simple or what?
We cannot change the weather. We can dress accordingly and be prepared.
We can have an abundance of information, an overload it seems today. Will that change the course of events?
I watched a few minutes of discussion a few minutes ago on a subject I find interesting. The conversation between two scholars started off slow so as I a simple man could follow, then they blew up the words and phrases to the extent they become confusing. Many words and long winded terminology lost me! Yet they did not seem to address the question therefore solved nothing.
At this moment in my life after the devastating ordeal with hospitals and such another life altering event happened two days ago, makes me ask the question, why care or try any more seems the proverbial straw that broke the camels back has done me in mentally and physically. I'm a boxer down for the ten count and no more in me to get up, only to get up and be knocked down once more. There is no more fight left in my tired old soul! I'm done, I have give my all . . . all my life and have a few regrets.
Animals will give up, go into shock and die without hope. Example of which I documented in a case where my dog Nic-O-las gave up and was almost lifeless. I was determined to change that and over a two day period put forth life back onto him by giving him the will, determination and much needed love to continue. (((This two part post is in my archives in September or October of 2010 titled Nic-O-las. )))
I NOW HAVE COME TO THE CONCLUSION FATE IS PREDETERMINED AND RARELY ALTERED.
FAITH I LOOK AT AS BEING THE ABILITY TO ACCEPT FATE. SIMPLE HEAH!
I HAVE USED MY DETERMINATION OF FIXING AND CHANGING, THINKING UPON ANY AND ALL THINGS, ONLY TO SELF-DESTRUCT, DESTROYING MY LITTLE WORLD AS I ONCE KNEW IT.
DOES NOT MATTER IN THE LEAST IF I AM RIGHT! A LIFETIME OF LEARNED LIFE LESSONS AS I APPLY THEM, MEANS SQAUT! WHAT DOES IT MATTER TO BE RIGHT AND SUFFER THE CONSEQUENCES, ONLY TO BE SMACKED DOWN FOR THE TEN COUNT. STILL ALIVE BUT REELING FROM ALL THE TRAINING PUT INTO IT FROM A LIFETIME, OF JABS, AND HOOKS, SO MANY TIMES, I GIVE UP. IF THIS IS MY FATE I GIVE UP AND FOLLOW THE REST OF MY LIFE SITTING IN MY ROCKING CHAIR FILLED WITH SO MANY HITS TO THE HEAD, I HAVE SIMPLY QUIT THINKING.
MY MOTHER IS OVER 80 YEARS OF AGE, STILL WITH A SOMEWHAT SOUND MIND. I SHALL NEVER GET THERE BECAUSE SHE INADVERTENTLY, or . . . IS SMART ENOUGH TO WEATHER ALL THE STORMS IN HER LIFE. SHE HAS BEEN THROUGH SO MUCH MORE THN I, YET SHE HAS CARRIED ON EVEN IN THE HEAVIEST LOAD, A TRUE PILLAR OF STENGTH IN WHICH I NEVER HAD.
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Only a few months ago and several times in the last few years while lying awake before sleep, I thought to myself, "IF THE REST OF MY LIFE PHYSCALLY AND MENTALLY DEEPENS WHAT I'M NOW GOING THROUGH THEN I WOULD LIKE TO PASS AWAY IN MY SLEEP!"
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IF YOU BELIEVE IN FATE, ACCEPT IT WHICH AT THIS MOMENT I DO, THEN DON'T FRET!
I NOW SEARCH FOR THE FAITH TO FOLLOW MY FATE . . . OF WHICH I'VE SEARCHED A LIFETIME FOR!
I FIND MYSELF AS MY YORKSHIRE TERRIER WAS ONCE, GETTING COLD AND LIFELESS AS SEEMS THE WORLD I HAVE KNOWN HAS DISENTIGRATED AROUND ME. I NEED THE LOVE AND DETERMINATION FROM PEOPLE AND THE STRENGTH WITHIN TO CARRY ON!
I WILL WRITE IN MORE DETAIL SOMEDAY ABOUT THE LAST STRAW ON THE CAMEL'S BACK. THOSE OF YOU THAT FOLLOW MY MOST HUMBLE BLOG MIGHT ASK "WHAT CAN BE WORSE THAN DYING FOR A FEW MINUTES AND SURVIVING."
SEEMS MY WISH WAS TEMPORARILY GRANTED. NOW A LIGHTNING BOLT OF CURSE OR BLESSING DEPENDING ON HOW THIS HAND I WAS DEALT TURNS OUT!
YOUR PROBABLY ASKING "HOW CAN ONE GIVE UP AND ASK TO PASS AWAY IN THEIR SLEEP?" I HOPE YOU'VE NEVER BEEN THERE AND NEVER DO!
I HAVE BEEN NUMB OF HEART AND MIND RECENTLY, THIS LAST TURMOIL I MUST FACE, DECIDEDLY AT THIS MOMENT PLAYS OUT WITH A HEAVY HEART, MORE SO THAN THE BLOOD CLOT THAT ALMOST KILLED ME.
I CAN AND DID RECOVER FROM THE NEAR DEATH EXPERIENE OF MY HEART STOPPING. ONLY MY FATE WILL MAKE ME RECOVER FROM THE HEAVINESS THAT NOW RESIDES IN MY HEART . . . . .
Glenster, I think you are getting into a weird area here. Your recent bout with death has scarred you. But you are beginning to take, I feel, the wrong lessons from it. Faith and acceptance of imagined 'predeterminism' is the wrong path, and speaks to your religious indoctrination as a child. You know better. But since you have been deprived recently of the day-to-day existence to which you were accustomed, you are grasping for meaning and self-validation. I hate seeing you struggle with this. I feel that you need to step back and re-analyze. If anyone I know is able to see purpose and beauty in life, it is you. Rely on that ability and adapt. That is your personal strength. You and I have many years left here, I'm sure. Of course they won't be the quality years that we had in our youth, but it is a sentence that should be served if we have even the least little bit of self-respect and stick-to-it-ness. And I know you do...you have just misplaced it(look behind the couch. that's where things usually end up around here). Keep writing and keep your thoughts linear. You...WE...can get through these rough patches.
ReplyDeleteI won't add anything here since I think Timster knows you way better than me. Just know I hope you can get into a better place in your thoughts and also physically. I know things have been rough for you, but I know you can hang in there and push forward. It's not over till it's over my friend.
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